


Found My Body, Soul Nowhere in Sight

by NecroMady



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Angst, Attempted comfort anyway, Caesar's Legion, Decapitation, Emetophobia, Father-Daughter Relationship, Followers of the Apocalypse (Fallout), Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Other, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Aftermath, Retrograde Amnesia, Scarification, Shamira escaped with little bro Jotham not long before this, The scar stuff is just mentioned, at the end, cptsd at that, mentioned - Freeform, shamira is stubborn and Sal is trying his best after finding out he has kids, those bullets to the head didn’t do good for him, typical legion bs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 07:13:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27159848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NecroMady/pseuds/NecroMady
Summary: She’s sitting next to her father, and they’ve never been further apart.
Kudos: 2





	Found My Body, Soul Nowhere in Sight

She’s sitting next to her father, and they’ve never been further apart. 

The silence is tense and palpable inside of one of the Followers’ tents as they await her test’s results. A deep dread has settled in her stomach, but she’s trying to ignore it, trying to save face. She’s picked a corner of the tent to focus on, sunlight shining through the unwound threads. 

She takes glances at her father beside her. She finds he looks about as upset as she feels. Her father looks so old right now, even if the past is lost to him it weighs heavy on him all the same. I wish I could forget.

She doesn’t know why he’s here now, at all, it really just serves to irritate her further because he wasn’t there to do anything about their 10 years of slavery. She glares at the ground, picking at a callous on her thumb. I’ll get through this on my own, like I always have.

He runs a hand through his hair, a nervous tick of his shes known since childhood, spotting the bullet wounds as he finally looks to her since they’ve been in the tent, sorrow set deep in his eyes. 

“Do you want to talk about… any of it?” He waves a hand around, gesturing vaguely. Whether it’s because he doesn’t want to say what specifically, or he doesn’t know where to begin, she isn’t sure. She scoffs at him, turning away and gritting her teeth.

“What’s there to talk about?” She answers dismissively, hoping he leaves it until they know the results and she knows what she has to do. But he doesn’t.

“What will we do if you are?” She feels like she’s suffocating, “I’ll deal with it myself, but I won’t be.” She snaps, and the silence comes in again, she hopes it sticks.

“When did… it happen?” He looks pained as he asks, and she glares as her hands tremble in anger. He doesn’t know what I’ve been through, he’s not the one that’s been used. 

“The night before, When I grew a pair and decided to get us out. Chopped his head off, not like you’d have done it.” Really, it could have been before that, but she’s never been sure how reproduction works anyway. He looks pained at her assessment, itching at the hand scar representing her on his forearm.

“Is that why you fled?” He looks ready to cry, and she feels a lump growing in her throat in anger as she tenses her fists. 

“Fuck no, I didn’t give a shit after it happened the first 3 times. They were gonna kill Joth.” His tears flow freely, and her hands itch for her confiscated knife, I’ll give the bastard something to cry over. 

“I’m so sorry mija.” He wipes his eyes, and holds out his hand towards her. She looks to his big tears, his hand, then his face again.  
She growls, “What we’ve been through is mine to carry, you can’t just enter now and act like our dad.” 

She’s ready to leave the fucking tent, the whole of Freeside, just grab her brother and go. But no- Jotham needs treatment, Jotham wants their dad, Jotham wants to stay, so she‘ll stay until he says so.  
A different doctor enters the tent, looking down at her clipboard.

“Ma’am, it seems you’re pregnant.” She announces, babbling on, but Shamira tunes out, the dread growing through her whole body. What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck, why this time? How am I going to do this, Jotham can’t know, I don’t want one of those fucking demons, I wish they would all die, I wish I would have died- She’s spiraling, her breath getting quick and short, feeling beyond sick. 

She feels a hand reach to her’s and she flinches hard enough to fall out of the rickety chair. The doctor and her dad look at her in concern, her dad wiping his eyes.  
“Mira,” her dad reaches again towards her. She takes his hand this time, sits back in the chair, and vomits.

She’s by her father, and they’ve never been farther apart.


End file.
